Not the End. Merely the Beginning.

I tried water polo but my horse drowned.

     As school is coming to an end, all of my friends are getting excited for their summer plans of relaxation. I on the other hand am awaiting a hectic summer. My summer is booked to the max with rodeo. I love rodeo so much that I let it over take my social life for the whole summer.
     I think it is horrible that some people don't know what rodeo is all about. Most kids in school don't know that I rodeo and may not even know that I own horses. I bet nearly every kid in Beulah High School could tell you at least five boys that play basketball. It is a shame that some sports go unnoticed. I practice just like all the other sports. I ride for an hour a day everyday and that doesn't include the hours spent caring for my horses everyday. Sport is defined as a competitive physical activity. Technically that means hobbies such as rodeo, dancing, and cheering should be recognized as sports.
     I am not asking for the smurf squad to come cheer for me at every rodeo. I simply just want kids to know there is such thing as rodeo. I would like for more people to compete and realize how much fun it is. As of now, I am the only high school student that rodeos from Beulah.
     My horse Dandy has the heart the size of Texas. He is always willing to give me his all. We have an incredible bond that is built all on trust. Sometimes, I feel as though I care more about him than my brother. I spoil him very much. After every run, I give him a whole apple and he gobbles it up. He has won the last three rodeos for me and we are currently third for the year-end in North Dakota. The top four go to nationals, so I hope to qualify for nationals again.
     You could be having as much fun as I do every weekend. All you need to do is start competing. If you live in town and are unable to own a horse, you are always welcome to come ride horse at my house. The only reason people own cats and dogs are because they live in the city, and they aren't allowed to have a horse.

Miracles

     Miracles happen in all shapes and forms. You just have to look for them. Whether it’s getting a lucky hand of cards, finding money, or surviving a near death experience. Personally I believe my 1/16^th Irish blood really gives me a fourth leaf on my clover. Through my years I have had three main miracles. 

     Pulver’s voice slowly fades into the background. Click. Those two? No I can make a strip candy there! Click. That pair? Whoa no there are more jelly over there!! Click. One more candy and 14 moves. I can do this. I can’t let my month and a half of practice fail me now. Click. I, I, I, did it? I did it!!

“Woohoo! I did it!!”

Courtney hears my yelling an immediately spins around, “You beat level 79!?!?”

We high five and Pulver gives us the eye.

“I just… figured out how to name that Alkane,” I quickly attempt to cover for my disruption.

Pulver’s chuckle proves to me that my cover was blown.

     Finally the raging water had gone down. Huge tree trunks filled the small gap beneath the bridge. My mom was on the creek bank and waiting on me. My task was simple. I was in charge of rapping a large metal chain around one of the huge logs. The chain was heavy for my arms that were much smaller at the time. As I stuck my hand in between two pieces of wood, I creature the size of my hand jumped onto the tree trunk I was standing on. I quickly ran for the bank. The Wolf Spider chased after me with its legs as big as fingers. Tears began racing down my checks. Once I reach the safety of the old wooden bridge, I notice my body is shaking in fear from my hands to my knees.

     Today is Lumberjack Day. I have never completely understood why each day of homecoming week has to have a theme. I hop into my truck wear my “lumberjack hat.” The sky is still pitch black due to it being 6:30 AM. Our FFA Parliamentary Procedure morning practice is the reason for this very early drive. My dim lights shine on to the continuous gravel road. I use my dims because they are brighter than my brights which are pointed straight at the ground. Suddenly a deer is right in front of me. I firmly press the breaks but the deer is just too close.

Poomff!! Psst!

Lost in confusion, I realize that the dust in the air must have come out with the airbags. The huge airbags make the road not visible. As the deflated, I see I am headed straight into the right ditch. I quickly crank the wheel left. The shifty gravel throws me directly towards the left ditch. My rims catch. I begin to roll. This is going to total my pickup for sure. Crack. Roll. Crack.

     It’s funny how a person reacts to these life miracles. Reactions such as over excitement, over emotional, and even over calm often happen. To this day, I am still unsure why my life never flashed before my eyes as I was rolling. My only thought was that I would wreck my prized truck. I had no concern of the face that I could die. If it were to happen over again, I know the second time around my life would flash before my eyes. Yet, I also know that I would still be just as calm because I know that my Savior Jesus Christ is in charge of all of the miracles in my life.

Addict Thoughts

“Doc, help me. I’m addicted to Twitter!” 
The doctor replies, “Sorry, I don’t follow you …"

     Urban Dictionary defines addiction as when you do something more times than a frat boy says the word bro in one day. We all are addicts. Some fall victim to Twitter, Facebook, or Snapchat. Others have a guilty pleasure of shoes, food, or spending money. We all have that one strange addiction though. The problem may not be as bizarre as the ones people have on the television show My Strange Addictions, but their is still that overruling question of WHY CAN'T I STOP?

     I am a true addict of Candy Crush. Most people have heard of the game or maybe even played it. I claim the name of The Ultimate Candy Crusher. Okay you caught me. My real name is Leah, and technically I have never been named such thing. I am an addict though. The true kind that wastes at least two hours everyday and often times more than that. I even play it in class. Of course there is always the risk of getting caught with my phone out, but      Candy Crush is worth it. I stay up passed midnight every night often just trying to beat another level. Recently, I have had a problem of being sick. It is more than likely caused from lack of sleep, dehydration, eating gluten, or maybe even a mix of all of them. BUT, Candy Crush is worth it.

     At this point you all think I need mental help, I understand your concerns and I am in the process of getting my life back. After I beat level 79, I promise I will work on playing less. I have been stuck on this unbeatable level since two weeks ago, and I have tried over 50 times to beat it. Mission Impossible will one day be possible. I keep trying and trying and I continue to fail. I have just come to the realization that the reason I wrote this blog about Candy Crush was in desperate hope that one of you could beat level 79 for me. I played three lives of Candy Crush before I got the motivation to write this blog, and I will more than likely play at least three or more before I go to bed.

All Tanked Up

What do you get when you cross an octopus and a cow?
An animal that can milk itself.

Watch "Tanked - Season 2 Promo" on YouTube

     Tanked is a reality TV show on Animal Planet. The show follows Acrylic Tank Manufacturing in Las Vagas. They are the world's largest manufacturer of customized aquarium installations and are owned by brother-in-laws Wayde King and Brett Raymer. Wayde's wife/Brett's sister Heather is the company's accountant. Heather and Brett's father Irwin Raymer, aka The General, is the office manager. Other regulars in the episodes include tank technician and plumer Robert "Robbie Redneck" Christlieb and sales coordinator Agnes Wilczynski.
     Unlike Duck Dynasty, Tanked is not scripted. The show is real. They go through common problems with things such as acrylic, pipes, tank inserts, and even sharks. My favorite episode is in season one when Heather has to put coral into a very small tank. When they get there they find out the sharks are already in the tank so she has to go in with the sharks to insert the coral pieces.
     The staff pulls jokes on each other quite often. One time Wayde gave the office fake lottery tickets. Brett and Heather thought they had each won 10,000 dollars. Another time Heather surprised Wayde for his birthday by puting a octopus tank in his office window.
     The first season is on Netflix and I recommend you all watch it. Last week it was on TV on Friday at 5pm and 6pm. I however have a hard time keeping up with TV shows so I prefer watching it online at Animal Planet's website.

Attention Awareness

If you are having trouble getting your kids' attention just sit down and look comfortable.
-My Mom

     Watch the video before reading my blog. Seriously! Stop reading and watch the video. It is only one minute long. You could spend one less minute on Facebook tonight to make up for your "wasted time".
      Awareness is the key to life. Stop looking for the key to happiness and just embrace everything around you. Did you see the bear that was moonwalking? Truth is 86 percent of people don't see the bear. It would be tragic if you were actually there and too busy counting to notice Kobe walk through the group. Maybe he isn't your main man, and you wouldn't care about missing the chance to meet him. It also could have been Jenna Marbles, and everyone wants to meet her. Girls think she is hilariously honest, and boys think she is hot. Hate to wreak your lifetime dreams, but rumor has it she is dating her new bodyguard mister muscles. The point is to never miss the details in life, because sometimes the details really matter.
     Sometimes you may be missing the little things or even life threatening situations. Multitasking is the main cause of unawareness. No I'm not saying multitasking is bad, but try to limit yourself to only doing two tasks at a time. Doing so will make it possible for you to notice a eagle, smell smoke, or even see Jenna Marbles. Take the time to stop and smell a cactus. That would be a new experience for me and probably almost everyone else. All people know cactus are sharp, but rarely does someone know what one smells like. Everyone in the world could explain the delicious smell of a rose, but only a quarter of the people would know that roses have thorns.
      Awareness is most important while driving, which is why we shouldn't text and drive. Now, I am not going to go and say I am perfect, because I have texted while I was driving before just like all of us have. What conversation is important enough to end your life for? Answering none is not being selfish. Everyone should answer none, because in all reality "Last night was great. I thin..." is not worth your life. Phones take your awareness away from the road. Just a few days ago, Mr. Zubke's girlfriend's cousin was texting and drove head on into a semi in the other lane. We are teenagers; we aren't invincible. Next time you go to grab your phone as you're driving 65 mph down the highway, I hope you consider the risks on not being aware.

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Bro.

Sister: My brother is a real pain.
Grandpa: It could be worse.
Sister: That's impossible.
Grandpa: He could have a twin.

     Since the legendary Cinderella, sibling fights have always been the main problem. Does age difference between siblings affect how well they get along? I have often asked myself this question, because of my eight year old brother Lane. I have friends who have siblings who are much older and younger than them, and they seem to get along better than my brother and I do. However, I also have friends who have siblings close in age, and they also get along well with them. Are my brother and I just not very "compatible" siblings? Do we just never really want to get along with one another? Or is there really some correlation between the age gap in siblings, and how well they get along with one another?
     There has been a lot of research done about this topic, and many families even try to have children spaced apart a certain way to guarantee that their children will get along. Many psychologists and family doctors say that how well siblings get along depends mainly on their personalities, not how far apart in age they are. Other factors to consider are things such as parenting strategies and children's gender. However, it has been found that children who are more than two years apart sometimes have more conflict than those closer in age. Often, the farther apart in age the siblings are, the more they will fight. Kids who are closer in age are more likely to spend time together and to share friends and interests. Siblings who have closer relationships in childhood generally have more positive times together. Siblings who are not as close and have conflicting personalities often fight more. These siblings can even carry their resentments and anger to old age.
     Lane is my reason for why I will be an angry grandma. I really do love the kid, but we have had our moments. When he was one and a half, he threw our house phone at me and made my whole left jaw back and blue for weeks. The phone eventually transformed into big metal toy tractors. Incase you were wondering, they don't feel too great. Last year at his birthday party, he was shooting me with his not so soft airsoft gun. My mom watched and laughed at us.
     I must admit I am not all innocence either. Several years ago when Jenny was over, my brother kept kicking us. I finally pushed him, and he fell on to a laundry basket and got a bloody nose. Three years ago I was shoveling the sidewalk, and he ran right into my shovel mid swing. My mom came running out screaming at me for using a shovel to hit my brother. We both bursted out laughing as we told her that it was accident and that I wasn't  beating him with the shovel. He now has a inch long scar between his eyebrows from that horrible accident.
     We usually are fighting but on one rare occasion we hugged. This picture is from right after I told him that on my way to National FFA I would get to stop at the John Deer factory to buy him a new tractor. What can I say? He is the best brother I have.

Dream vs. Dream

There was this boy who woke up one night with a nightmare. He cries, “Mummy, Mummy!” His mother came rushing into the bedroom and the boy told her that he had a dream that Grandma died. So a week later, his Grandma died.The boy woke up another night screaming and he told his mother that he dreamt that Grandpa died. Strangely enough, a week later Grandpa died. The boy woke up yet another night screaming that he had a nightmare in which his father died.The mother told the father and he became very cautious. He watched his health and treated his body excellently. So a week passed and the postman died.
     What is a dream? Is it your thoughts at night or your high hopes. These should not be named the same. I do not dream at night about my dreams for the future, nor do I dream of doing my dreams at night in the future.
     Having these two named the same may wreak kids confidence. It tells them that the horrible things that happen in the their dreams are the same thing as what they want for the future. Then, we wonder why children don't want to sleep.
     I have always had scary dreams that skip aroundand do not make any sense. At the end, I usually end up dieing. For example, our house is flooding and I drive the diesel pickup into the water and drown, I am in a sketch old motel and people chase me with needles, or when I am running away from a psychotic killer, I get suck under a fence and he stabs me to death. I have had enough bad dreams to count for 10 people.
     Night dreams should be named mistakes. Then, all of our "mistakes" would happen at night while we are sleeping. Often times our night thoughts are forgotten too. I would definitely enjoy sleeping through and forgetting all of my mistakes.

On The Rise

Q: What do you give a person with water on the brain?
A: A tap on the head
     What is on your brain? At this time of the year, people usually think about summer, prom, state, spring break, scholarships,  graduation, or even May Day baskets. My mind races with more than these child like concerns.
     The temperature continues to steadily increase. The sun breaks out from hibernation for the first time in months. The warmth in the air illuminates the faces of millions of people. The wonderful melting process starts again. Snow transforms into water. Lots of snow transforms into lots of water, too much water. Okay that's enough. Woah, woah. Stop! Too much, way too much water for anyone to handle.
     Flooding always races through my mind at this time of the year. If I see a big puddle in the yard, my heart drops to my gut. My side aches with anticipation. Might as well kick me in the gut now, because when our house floods it devours my insides. The sight rattles my brain.
     I pray for an easy break. Just this year, spare us from this havoc, God. I constantly remind myself to keep my fingures crossed, buy every rabbit foot in sight, and make a wish at 11:11 every morning and night. If any of these desperate pleads for good luck work, the snow will shift directly into air. Poof, no water in the process this year.
     Last year, we finally built a diversion for the creek. This little project costed us many years of fighting with the Water Board and more than enough money. The diversion's first test may appear soon.
     I hope the puddles in the yard retain there small figures. Maybe this year will be different. I continue to run through the possibilities in a desperate attempt to tell the future. Truth is only time will tell me whether the grass in our yard will be visible in a few weeks.

RECNAC -- Read it Backwards

DOCTOR: "It's bad news, you have cancer and Alzheimer's."
PATIENT: "Oh well, it could be worse - at least I don't have cancer."

     We all have had a grandparent, parent, aunt, uncle, cousin, or sibling that has had cancer. North Dakota seems to be more prone to this horrible disease. Radioactive iodine from US nuclear bomb tests may have ultimately caused between 10 000 and 75 000 cases of cancer in people who were living in the USA in the 1950s and 1960s, says the US National Cancer Institute. Most of the people at risk would have been under the age of 15 at the time of exposure, and about 75% under the age of 5. Some scientists believe the wind blew the radioactive particles right to the North Dakota area. If true, the particles would have caused thousands of people in North Dakota to eventually get cancer.
     It can not be true, no way. The government would never hide such a tragic mistake from the public. They would never try to cover up an accident to prevent them from getting sued for thousands of fatalities. Imagine the headlines, Government Kills It's Own Citizens. Since the1950s and 1960s, there have been several experimental tests on people for the results of radioactive radiation, but the results were never released. Afterwards, testing nuclear weapons was ruled illegal by the courts. I am not one to question the government, but the facts do not seem to add up in their favor.
     I believe that this explanation could account for the excessive cancer cases in our area. Proving that radioactive radiation causes cancer maybe almost impossible. There are more ways to get cancer then just by being exposed to radioactive particles, and we can no long do testing on nuclear weapons to see its results. We know what puts you at risk of cancer,  but the real cause may never be found.
     I do not wish for anyone to die of cancer, but it seems that everyone I am close to gets the disease. I begin to worry that I am next. I am soon reminded that my dad drinks atleast two cans of Mt. Dew everyday, and he still alive. As long as my dad remains cancer free, I will put my cancer worries in safe keeping for the years to come.

Be mine?

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Sherwood.
Sherwood who?
Sherwood like to be your valentine.

     With Valentine's Day just a day away, I want to help you win your love's heart. My one simple knock knock joke will make them fall for you for sure. 61.8% of people in the United States celebrate Valentine's Day. You shoud to be 1 the nearly 200,000,000 people participating in the loving season this year. The pressure tends to get overwhelming, so I will help you out.

     53% of people would end their relationship if they did not receive a present on Valentine's Day from their lover. In other words, you need to buy a gift for your special someone. 31,190,000,000 dollars are spent on February 14th that averages to 126.03 dollars per person. The more the merrier. Go all out with your gifts. Men plan to spend 75% more than women. If you are the man, you will have to cash out more money than your lovely lady.  Flowers are the most popular gift on Valentine's Day with an accumulative price of over 403,000,000 dollars each year. Rumor has it that the aroma from a flower triggers a woman's affection. Women often enjoy jewelry and flowers. 73% of flowers are bought by men, and it doesn't matter what kind of jewelry as long as you buy the most expensive diamond in the store. If you are a woman, settle for 1 of the 180,000,000 cards bought on this red holiday. 85% of cards are bought by women. Guys never expect much more than your loving acceptance of their gift to you, but make sure to get a card with a sweet saying inside.

     You will succeed this Valentine's Day as long as you say the joke and buy the appropriate gift. My last recommendation for success is that you watch the video above on the true meaning of Valentine's Day. I would like to give a special thanks to New York Time's for providing the public with all these facts, and I wish you the best of luck on the challenging and often heart crushing holiday.

Land After Time

Q. What do you call an overweight ET?

A. An extra cholesterol

     How will the world end?  People have imagined numerous ways the world might end such as a flood, heat, frost, zombie apocalypse, nuclear war, black hole, asteroid, pandemic, or even evil robots gone. Truth is the world as we know it will come to a screeching halt in 50 years. Four fingered, green creatures will trample our plant and kill everyone in roughly 0.0065 seconds with their UFO guns.

     Paul overlooks the damage done to this strange land away from home. He scavenges threw the blasted remains of a large farm house. He searches in hope of finding a mysterious treasure to bring back to his pals. He notices a slice of tree laying on the torched floor. These earthlings seemed to have scratched a drawing into the wood flake. The one creature fits the criteria that has been determined for these beings. It obtains the strange long hair and big mouth that had been sighted by the trillions upon landing on this place. The other being confuses his senses. The thing on the slip seems normal. This thought blows his mind. He can not recall a visit to this land in the years before. The friend drawn before him seems to be one of his kind. These mistaken thoughts expand in his brain. Flipping through scenario after scenario of ways these creatures could have known of his planets residents. He often reverts back to the idea that he was just quick to jump to conclusions. The gun then reassures his wacky inferences. The friendly body has to be one of his kind.

     Now that these creatures are dead, being exposed no longer threatens Paul. Yet, he still proceeds to question the past. Who believed in these obscure drawings? Did these beings really know of our existence?

Twist In Time

Q: What do a tornado, a hurricane and a redneck divorce have in common?
A: In the end, someone is going to loose a trailer house.


     Back in the summer of '98, man it was killing time. It was long and reckless. It needed to unwind. The clouds hovered in the distance with assumed rain showers. Although the sun's rays shined brilliantly, they could not puncture through the fierce charcoal clouds. The sun glowed in warmth, but the grass failed to attain the sunshine. Everything calmed to a lull. No movement in the distance presented itself. As if coaxed to sleep, nature rested.

     Mother washed the dishes. They dirtied themselves and never could keep a clean face. The presents of a two year old child kept the new house alive. Although new to Mother and child, the house was old news to Father, who owed his childhood to the ancient towering farm house.

     The young child that I was had only one thing on mind. It occupies any two year old child's mind. Yes candy, it in fact presented itself as the glorious prize for going to the bathroom. Not just any candy either, the most royal Starbursts stood at stake. I often faked my time on the golden thrown just to get my chompers on the sweet chewy goodness. On this very day at this very hour, I nearly peed my pants. I raced to that golden thrown with hopes of relief and candy.

     Meanwhile, Mother scrubbed her way through yet another dish. She soon came to notice a twig, no branch. Oh heavens, she now realized that a whole tree flew by the kitchen window. In a hurried scurry she raced to rip me off the toilet that I treasured oh so very much. As she entered the dark gloomy basement stairs, she ripped the phone off the counter. I lacked any concern of the tornado up above, because for me the true problem brought horrifying thoughts to my mind. I screamed "MOM I DIDN'T WIPE!"

Vacation Out Back

Q: What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with a giraffe?

A: Broken Legs

     Let's take a journey to the land down under. NO NOT ANTARCTICA... We shall spend our time in a mystical place of joy and hope. We shall see things beyond our wildest dreams. Please note: no unicorns will be seen on this adventure. Let's take a hop, a skip, and a jump (or a plane) to Australia.

     Australia is mostly known for the Outback, the Great Barrier Reef, and the Sydney Opera House. It's a given that our first destinations would be these three. We will hike the enormous Outback in search of Kangaroo Jack. We will try to find Nemo while scuba diving and snorkeling. The true thrill seekers that we are will show as we para sail over the Great Barrier Reef in hopes of possibly catching a glimpse of Free Willy. We will also stop at Sydney to listen to some tunes in the Opera House (*side note* I often mispronounce Opera as Oprah).

     After the three most common tourist attractions, we will go to the three best theme parks in Australia. The theme parks consist of Movie World, Sea World, and Wet'n'Wild. Movie World has a roller coaster that goes from 0-100 in 2 seconds. Sea World obviously has animals like sharks, polar bears, penguins, and sting rays. The main performance at Sea World is the jet ski stuntmen. The worlds best freestyle jet skier and a former X Games gold medalist team up for the Jet Stunt Extreme jet ski show. Wet'n'Wild is famous for its slide named the Kamikaze. We will plunge down on a tube for a 11 meter drop at a step 70 degree angle and reach speeds up to 50 mph. If that's not crazy then call me Betty White.

     Australia at its finest has three main attractions and three insanely thrilling theme parks. Are you ready to rock? Because I'm ready to roll, roll on down to Australia for an out of this world experience. Well, it will at least be an out of this country experience anyways.